Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Incomplete Thoughts Connected Only by the Heart
Rest? That is not my experience of life, and not my experience of the Christian life either! From what I have observed, it doesn't seem to be the experience of others. People are always after something. I'm always after something. I'm a driver...a fidgety, restless soul. Even in my hobbies I'm pushing: running, cycling, hiking. What am I chasing? What are you chasing?
As I sat in various airports over the last month I've been overwhelmed by the amount of people: people coming and going, talking and typing, eating and reading. As I sat at a standstill on the 101 in LA, pinned-in by a sea of Audis, semis, and 1993 Toyotas, I realized that the world, except for an infant's handful of people, was unaware and indifferent to my existence. 7,000,000,000 people! Yes...I want you to see the zeros! 7,000,000,000 people coming and going, talking and typing, driving and texting, working and spending, climbing and building, pushing...striving...seeking...
And I wondered. What if when I come to the end of my life, just a few breaths left in the tank, and my heart asks me, "So what did you do with your life?" I will think. I will be tempted to list accomplishments, projects completed, degrees accumulated, people taught, races run, family loved...but I wonder if the truth will be, "I strove."
I can't be lazy. I don't want to be unproductive, but I don't want to spend my life striving. Perhaps when I learn to rest in Jesus...I will find the space to quit striving, the space to LIVE.
Then the land had rest from war...